"This is he," is what the voice said when I asked if he was the same Kevin Chisolm who went to grade school with me in New York during the mid-1960s. We proceeded to speak about the stations our lives had passed through since we last got together. It was as if we were reconnecting after almost 33 days, or 33 weeks, not almost 33 years.
We agreed to get together a few weeks later, in the same neighboorhood in which we both grew up. I met his family and he met mine, which included a son who I named in fond memory of my childhood friend. We visited our playgrounds and walked past the apartment buildings in which we previously lived. When we stopped at the very spot in which he taught me how to play baseball, he astonished me by pulling out of his pocket a self-portrait I had sketched and mailed him shortly after moving to New Jersey while we were in sixth grade.
It was as if an old friendship had been rekindled. In truth, it was more like the continuation of a young friendship that had been interrupted by the nature of life in the pre-Internet age, when frequent phone calls to a different area code were beyond the means of most people.
In the 12 years since our reunion, Kevin and I have stayed in regular contact. We've met for coffee several times, enjoyed a few basketball games, a concert, and taken a ferry ride to a baseball game. We hooked up at a reunion of former classmates at St. Paul the Apostle School. Our families have gotten together for visits. Mostly, we've spoken on the phone about the ups and downs of our lives, his happy times and challenges and mine.
I learned that while I was completing my high school and college studies in New Jersey, he was doing the same in the Bronx and Maine, respectively. As I was launching my communication career, he was starting his career in biology in New York City. He was also acting on television daytime dramas and in commercials. I married and raised a family in New Jersey. Several years later, he did the same. In hindsight, our paths were destined to converge again. Fortunately, our friendship has stayed on track as our careers have taken a few twists and turns and lives have gone through some other changes.
Just as he was a positive part of my life during our grade school years, his thoughtfulness, ambition, patience and positive outlook are an inspiration for me today. His focus on being present in the moment, free from distraction, while we're together is refreshing in this age of smartphones (and watches). After we talk, even about some difficult topics, I feel a better person.
A day after his birthday, I thank Kevin for his good friendship -- before and after its 33-year break -- and wish him many more years of happiness and health.
A day after his birthday, I thank Kevin for his good friendship -- before and after its 33-year break -- and wish him many more years of happiness and health.
